CBT, or Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, has become the emotional equivalent of ‘Dettol antiseptic’  for many therapists. Tried, tested, and reliably effective when anxiety shows up, thanks to Mr. Aaron Beck. It functions on the principles of identifying and challenging distorted or unhelpful thoughts, and replacing them with more balanced thinking.

There is plenty of research to support it, but what I personally appreciate about CBT is that it doesn’t just tell you to calm down or think positive. It helps you understand your anxiety, get curious about it, and slowly change how you respond. Like learning to live with a noisy flatmate instead of constantly trying to kick them out.

CBT is flexible. It often blends in mindfulness, body-based work, and a recovery-oriented lens. And like with most therapies, it takes some trial and adjustment to see what works for you.

This is why I often turn to CBT when working with anxiety, and why it might be something worth exploring for yourself.

What CBT Tells Us About Anxiety

Most of us grow up thinking anxiety is a problem that needs fixing. We try to avoid it, distract ourselves from it, or push it away. That might look like putting off a difficult conversation, triple-texting a friend to check if you messed up, or keeping yourself constantly busy so there’s no time to feel anything.

CBT doesn’t see these behaviours as random. They are coping strategies that offer short-term comfort. But over time, they teach your brain that anxiety is dangerous and must be avoided. That belief is what keeps you stuck.

The starting point in CBT is simple but powerful. Anxiety is not a flaw. It is just an emotion. Like sadness or excitement, it has a job. It shows up when something feels uncertain or important. If we stop trying to get rid of it, we can start listening to what it’s trying to say.

Why Anxiety is Actually Important

As annoying as it feels, anxiety has a job. Without it, life would be chaos. Imagine crossing a highway without that little voice saying, “Hmm… maybe look both ways?” Or showing up to an exam completely relaxed because your brain forgot to care.

Anxiety is like your slightly dramatic but well-meaning friend. The one who always says, “Carry a jacket, it might rain,” even when it’s 35 degrees. Sometimes they overreact, but they’re not entirely wrong.

In small doses, anxiety helps us prepare, stay alert, and think twice before doing something reckless. Without it, we’d all be carefree maniacs with terrible impulse control.

The goal isn’t to get rid of anxiety. It’s to learn how to turn its volume down when it’s yelling unnecessarily, and CBT helps us do just that.

How CBT Helps Change Your Relationship with Anxiety

CBT doesn’t aim to get rid of anxiety. It helps you change how you respond to it.

Think of anxiety like a smoke alarm. Sometimes there’s real danger, and sometimes it’s just burnt toast. CBT teaches you how to tell the difference and not panic every time it goes off.

For example, if someone doesn’t reply to your message, your brain might jump to “I’ve upset them.” CBT helps you pause, question that thought, and consider other explanations like “Maybe they’re just busy.”

Over time, you learn to spot anxious patterns, respond instead of react, and stay grounded even when anxiety shows up. It’s like learning to drive with a nervous passenger. They might keep talking, but you don’t have to stop the car.

CBT gives you tools to hear anxiety without letting it take over the wheel.

Does This Mean I Won’t Feel Anxious?

No, it doesn’t mean anxiety disappears. It means it stops running the show.

Once your relationship with anxiety changes, you’ll likely still feel anxious at times during transitions, conflict, uncertainty, or when something matters to you. The difference is that you’ll know how to respond to it.

Instead of spiralling or shutting down, you’ll be able to pause, name what’s happening, and choose how you want to move forward. You’ll trust that anxiety is just one voice in the room, not the whole truth.

You might still overthink now and then or feel your heart race before a big meeting. But you’ll be better at noticing when anxiety is speaking from habit, not fact. And you’ll know how to stay with yourself through it.

You won’t be aiming for a life without anxiety. You’ll be aiming for a life where anxiety doesn’t hold the pen.

So what you’re learning isn’t how to get rid of anxiety, but how to work with it more skillfully.

Remember

Anxiety may not disappear, but your relationship with it can change. And that shift can make all the difference.

CBT doesn't promise quick fixes. It offers a way to identify your patterns of anxiety loop, find out the negative/unhelpful loop of anxiety, as not all anxiety is a problem, a set of tools that help you understand what's going on inside, so you can learn to sit with problem as reflect on it and analyse to problem solve it 

You begin to look into yourself  with compassion and fallibility as a human with a critical judgement voice is a faint sound. Even when anxiety shows up, you know how to meet it without losing your footing. You no longer need to silence it or let it take over. You can acknowledge it, stay present, and still move forward.

And maybe that’s the point. Not a life without anxiety, but a life where you are the one steering it.

Thinking About Starting Therapy?

If you’re curious about CBT or want to understand your anxiety better, working with a therapist can help you explore what’s underneath it, without judgment or pressure. 

It's not about diagnoses but a way to live where you feel grounded and anchored regardless. Questioning the “Whys” and working on the “Hows” that’s what a therapist certified in CBT offers, a guiding compass with tools at your disposal. Book your session today with Namaste Psychology equipped with professionals/therapists trained in CBT therapy and more.

This is your 1st step towards finding your footing.